There's no use crying over missing paste... or is there?

I'm at my wit's end. This post is neither well-constructed or well-orchestrated, it is born out of my frustration and need to throw some questions out to the universe, as well as voice some problems I have with my location, and problems that my location has with itself.

There are no givens here; here today, gone tomorrow seems the most fitting phrase. I first encountered this with the library books, but it's not just them. You put a pencil down, you're pretty much guaranteed it won't be there when you reach for it again. How can any progress be made? How can anything get done when you can't even gather or count on the basics?

For three or more days now, we've tried to continue cleaning and repairing the books in the school, but have been stunted by lack of tape and erasers. Each time new supplies were brought in, they dissappeared again, sometimes within hours. This morning, as we try to conclude with rallied supplies, we are distracted by missing paste this time, as well as talk of the latest break into the school cafeteria. School boys, probably, under the influence of kari, no doubt. When pens can disappear with the wind, and books can be torn to shreds and not noticed...

They are only hurting themselves! Don't they realize that?

CH has been infiltrated several times, as well. And its not like CH is hoarding the wealth - ask and you shall receive is their general attitude. Because of the high frequency of bodies in the compound, nothing is static, there're no universals. I sort of tend to hold the CH to a higher standard than the village, because of its wealth of influence and experience and motivation and ambition, so not even having this place be something to rely on.... to set an example....

Where is my.... THEIR anchor? Where is my... THEIR discipline? Where is my... THEIR guidance? And GUIDANCE, mind you, not dictation. I now realize this has been part of what has made this week so trying. Big ideas, over-emphasized creativity and lack of concern over structure rule this place, as well as a "guiding" figure who seems to "enthusiastically shepherd" the numerous activities, even from afar. Overstimulation, on several levels. And lack of ownership. There is nothing wrong with big ideas, creativity or bending of the rules, but as a visiting fellow volunteer pointed out, "Sure, you can say you're going to have a free form garden with no supervision, but sooner or later, weeds are going to come, and there'll be no garden to tend to." (more or less)

So should we shrug off the missing bottle of paste and just get a new one to replace it? "Don't worry; be happy"? Or should we cry over missing paste?
I'm crying.